Monday, May 17, 2010

Written on February 7, 2010. But I Accidentally Deleted It

I love myself a whole lot more when I'm boring. The fact that I can have a good time being a blogger, a tea-drinker, a movie-watcher and a non-party(er) on a Friday night without feeling bored is really encouraging.

As much as I love being under the influence, going crazy, and being social, I now enjoy being sober, serene, and independent a whole lot more. Things are different when times are different. But for now, in this stressful but boring stage of my life, I'm better off doing my own thing.

I don't like things that I know aren't worth while. I don't like being a drunk, crazy girl anymore. I don't like when people I know hook up with other people and believe they're the shit. And I also don't like drugs - being around it just makes me feel gross, even if I'm NOT the one participating in it.

I know I've been all about changes and turning over a new leaf and becoming a better person and blah blah blah, but it's true. I've let myself get like this and it's up to me to get myself back to normal. I mean, I'm content with some stuff, but really resentful at others. If I accentuate my good qualities and lessen my negative ones, I think I'd feel a whole lot better with myself. I know for a fact better things would come too.

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