In All Honesty,

Suppressing my feelings for you was an okay process, but YOUR own feelings still affect me so much and it's difficult to get over them. I wish I didn't care about you so much, but i do. It hurts to know that you say you'll wait for me, but what exactly are you waiting for? I'm sorry about not being able to do anything about how I feel, but I only see you as a friend. I love you, but in a much different way than I love him. I'm actually IN love with him. I feel horrible for what I've done because never would I ever want anyone to lead me on as bad as I did to you. I should have told you the truth from the start. I guess I just didn't want to lose you and the affection you gave me. It's obvious we both know what we tried to forget isn't completely behind us yet. We BOTH got what we wanted at one point, although, I know you're still not satisfied, but I can't do anything about that anymore...I'm head over heels for him and I've never felt so happy with a guy before. He's definitely the highlight of my life, and I won't risk losing him.

I'm sorry.